Many families hesitate to seek additional support for their aging loved one. It usually takes a significant event — such as a fall, hospital stay, or missed medication — for them to make that decision. Even when warning signs appear months in advance, they can be easy to overlook. Older adults may also hesitate to share their struggles, fearing they will cause worry. This guide outlines the signs to watch for and what to do next.
Understanding ADLs and IADLs
In case you aren’t already familiar with these terms, understanding ADLs and IADLs can help families identify where help is needed. Basic ADLs, or activities of daily living, are everyday tasks that are essential to an individual’s well-being, like bathing, dressing, and eating. IADLs, or instrumental activities of daily living, require more advanced skills, such as managing finances, medications, meals, and transportation.
IADLs are usually easier to spot when someone is struggling. Older adults may even ask for assistance with these tasks before seeking help with ADLs.
Signs Your Aging Loved One May Need Additional Support
#1 Changes in Home Cleanliness and Upkeep
Your loved one may find home maintenance, repairs, and overall upkeep overwhelming. Watch for these signs:
- Overflowing trash cans
- Unsanitary conditions in the kitchen and bathrooms
- Clutter throughout the home
- Overgrown yard and clogged gutters
#2 Eating Habits and Weight
Look for changes in eating habits, including significant weight loss or gain. How is your loved one’s appetite? Are they skipping meals? What kind of food is your loved one eating? Do they have access to fresh, nutritious ingredients and choices?
#3 Personal Hygiene
Can your loved one take care of their personal hygiene each day, including bathing and grooming properly? Have you noticed them wearing the same clothes with spots and stains? Do they brush their teeth regularly, trim their nails, and get haircuts as needed?
#4 Increasing Forgetfulness That Affects Daily Life
Unopened mail, piling newspapers, unfilled prescriptions, and missed appointments may be a sign of forgetfulness. When assessing cognition, it’s important to distinguish between occasional forgetfulness and a possible warning sign of dementia.
Here are a few examples:
Occasional forgetfulness
- Forgetting an appointment or someone’s name but remembering later
- Occasional mistakes with bills
- Occasional assistance with settings on an electronic device
- Losing something but finding it later after retracing steps
Possible signs of dementia
- Forgetting recently learned information, or asking the same questions repeatedly
- Difficulty following a familiar recipe or tracking bills
- Trouble driving to a routine appointment or organizing a grocery list
- Putting things in unusual places and being unable to retrace steps
Signs it may be time to consider memory care >>
#5 Falls, Injuries, and Mobility Changes
Falls, injuries, or mobility changes can all signal that your loved one needs additional support. Falls or injuries may result from a medical condition, trip hazards in the home, or medication misuse. Fall prevention is essential to an older adult’s quality of life and well-being, as falls are the leading cause of injury for adults 65 and older.
Fall prevention tips for older adults >>
#6 Mental Health Changes
Your loved one may be experiencing social isolation and loneliness, placing them at risk of depression. Have you noticed your loved one withdrawing from hobbies or activities they once enjoyed? Has their behavior changed? Have any friends or neighbors shared concerns with you about your loved one’s mental health?
The benefits of living in a community >>
What to Do Next
If you start to notice a persistent pattern of the warning signs above, keep a simple log of your observations that includes the date and the changes you’ve noticed. Then, consider the following steps:
- Share specific concerns and observations with your loved one, and ask how you can make things easier for them.
- Pair concerns with practical solutions. For example, arrange for a grocery delivery if shopping is challenging.
- Involve their medical provider. Attend the appointment with your loved one so you can act as an advocate, ask relevant questions, share concerns, and seek guidance on the right solutions.
- Build a support team for your loved one. Consider including trusted friends and family, a geriatric care manager, or a home health aide to ensure a successful outcome.
- Plan ahead for senior living care, housing changes, downsizing, and advance care planning for medical decisions.
Reassure your loved one that seeking extra help doesn’t mean giving up independence. Taking action early — with input from a physician, a support team, and a plan — can help prevent a stressful crisis.
Explore Waverly Heights
Discover Waverly Heights, a nationally accredited nonprofit Life Plan Community in Gladwyne, Pennsylvania, nestled on a scenic 63-acre estate along Philadelphia’s Main Line. Our community offers a range of services, including independent living, personal care, memory support, and skilled nursing.
As part of Waverly Senior Services, we also provide exceptional home care and care management to support individuals in their homes. Our dedicated team is committed to creating a nurturing environment where residents can thrive. We look forward to supporting you on your journey! How can we help you today?
